(this article was written by a friend of ours)
make your life a happier place
When you reach the end of your days, will you be able to say you had a wonderful life? Or will you feel it was full of suffering & missed opportunities?
You’re painting that final picture now - in every single moment of your life. The way it turns out is not determined by what the world throws at you, but by how you respond to it.
Wise people say: “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade!”
Focus on What’s Right rather than What’s Wrong
Human beings spend a lot of energy dwelling on what’s wrong in life. We re-hash daily dramas. We point out our annoyances with people & situations. The TV “News” could be called the “Bad News” considering it only addresses negative things that occur. Our entire society seems to be geared towards focusing on life’s dramas, with very little attention given to acknowledging the positives.
Count your blessings regularly & don’t take the good things for granted. Identify at least one positive experience every day, whether major or minor & celebrate it.
Give thanks & feel grateful for all its benefits. Express your appreciation for it & for how great it made you feel. When you get into the habit of that, increase the number to 5 positive experiences, then 25, 50 & more. If you find yourself giving thanks continuously through the day, you know your life is going
While you do still need to identify problem areas in your life which need improvement, that process should be practical & matter of fact. Identify the problem & see what’s needed to improve it. Then make whatever changes you can. Deal with the problem, rather than dwelling on it.
Dwelling on the negatives helps nothing. Moaning about what’s ‘wrong’ only serves to drain your energy & make you feel bad.
Remember the guidance of the ‘serenity prayer’, which is to accept the things you can’t change & to change the things you can.
You should also be honest with yourself about the unhappy situations you’re actually choosing not to change. When you’re afraid of changing a situation, it can feel like you haven’t got the choice or power to change when, actually, you do. It only seems like you have no other options.
In reality, you just haven’t considered your choices consciously &
honestly. Your unconscious fears can cause you to fail before you even
begin & you end up feeling like a victim to your situation. There are many valid, life-affirming reasons why we do choose to stay in challenging situations. Whether you choose to stay in, or leave, an unhappy situation is not the issue. Suffering only comes when you feel that you’re a victim to it.
To avoid this, always assess your situation consciously. Be honest with yourself when you’re not prepared to take the risks involved with making a change. Acknowledge that the power of choice is always in your hands & that, at this time, you are choosing to stay.
When you’re honest with yourself, you don’t need to feel like a victim. Rather than hating a situation you’ve chosen to keep in your life, focus instead on all its wonderful positive aspects. See only the good in it & learn to love it. If you’re going to stay, you may as well benefit from it!
by Kathie Strmota
we really enjoyed reading this and wanted to share it with others on the blog.
Kathie makes note that "Human beings spend a lot of energy dwelling on what’s wrong in life. We re-hash daily dramas."
..... so true, even within my own family we see - or should we say hear - this so often. John and I talk about this and wonder if these people ever think they have anything 'good' happen in their lives .... they don't stop to take a good look at their own life, the wonderful things around them, the simple fact of being alive and the joy they may bring to others.
John and I are blessed with being able to enjoy so much time together and at the moment to have the opportunity to experience this life we have in Singapore. There are a few downsides to this by being away from 'home', but we do not dwell on that, but take each day as it comes and appreciate and enjoy what we have today.
now go out and enjoy your day!