Thursday, 14 May 2009

friendships and family

Today is going to be 33 degree's, the sky looks black and thundery, so no pool for me this morning!

One of my friend's here in Singapore wanted to do "something even if it is just wandering aimlessly around some mall or something". I am not a what is loosely called "a shopper" and to wander around aimlessly is not my ideal activity at anytime! But she is off back home soon (permanently) and I know that there will be many a time that I will wish her back here so we can "wander around aimlessly".

So sad when we hear of our friends having to return 'home', wherever their home happens to be. Some are happy to be returning home, others not so sure. Singapore can be a very itinerant area to live, people coming and going all the time, but over the past few months - and more than likely over the next couple of months too - people will be losing their jobs, packing up, and moving home.

I find it hard enough to be away from my own family and friends. People I am comfortable with, that I can laugh and cry and feel 'normal' with. When we arrived here it was difficult to create a new circle of friends, it takes hard work and it takes time .......

.......... then poof, we find they go off home too.

I am blessed though to have my computer ( which is my communication outlet) that enables me to stay in touch with family and friends wherever they may be. I have Facebook, Twitter, Flickr, emails, my blog, Skype and the local forum groups here in Sing too .....

....... and I even manage to write letters, real letters, you know those ones you stick a stamp on and put in the mail box?

I probably send off about five to eight letters a week, but do I hear back from these people? Sometimes, usually from those people I least expect to hear from, I think it is just a case of "out of sight, out of mind" from my friends and family. I am not the only person here that makes this comment, I hear this from many of my Singapore friends too!

I know we miss them more than they miss us. The things I miss most are the birthdays, the special events, family gatherings, the BBQ's in the back yard, the gathering of friends for a night out or dinner in their home.

I am not homesick, there are many things I do not miss about "home", but I do like to be in touch with family and friends.

I am not bored, I have many activities and interests that keep me busy on a daily basis.

and you know what was so special for us both last week?

We were invited into the home of a Singaporean Family ...... our first in all the time we have lived here.

We felt very honored and privileged to meet such a loving and warm family.

Saying "thank you" may be the two hardest words that friends share.

We like to see ourselves as independent and not needing anyone's help. When a friend does something for us, it is difficult to humble ourselves by thanking them.

Believe it or not, as strong as your need is to believe yourself independent, your friend may have an even stronger need to hear the words "thank you". Your friend may see that he is the one who is always doing the thanking and will appreciate that he is also a contributor to the friendship.

.... and for those of that are not blessed with a large extended family, it is important to cultivate close friendships with other families.

These are the people who are not related to us by blood, but care for us as if they were. In the world that we live in today when there are so many obstacles we must face, it makes sense to form a group of supportive people to surround yourself with.

When the chips are down, these are the people that you can count on.

Thank You

my friend

for taking the time to read this posting as my mind has been "wandering aimlessly around" all the above thoughts this morning!!

1 comment:

cajunsis said...

Oh, what a wonderful post Leone! Thank you for being such a terrific person :-) I have only known you a short while, but you are so inspiring and such a wonderful person to hang out with.

Love your ponderings and aimless wanderings...

See you soon!