Monday, 1 December 2008
my friend Barbara - RIP
In my last posting on THE blog I was up to leaving Blackwood and arriving back in Melbourne late on Sunday night...... Monday is our last day, so we decide to go back and spend time with Barbara and David at Bonbeach.
We saw them briefly on the day we arrived a week earlier, but wanted to just spend a wee bit more time with them. David had a stroke two years ago and is confined to the nursing home. Barbara comes in daily to spend time with him......her whole life has been turned upside down with these daily visits. No more time for herself, no more genealogy, no more visiting friends, no spending the day shopping etc.
All our packing was done, Janine did not need the car so we were free to leave just after lunch. We arrived at Bonbeach Residential Care and went straight to see my mum first who was sound asleep, so only stayed a short while with her. Then down to the community room to check on David who was having afternoon tea.
As soon as he saw us he started crying. He was quite distressed saying over and over that "Barbara was dead and its all my fault".
We told him she was running late and she would be there shortly ......but he became more distressed than usual crying and repeating that Barbara was dead and it was his fault. We took him for a walk hoping that Barb would be there soon..... we waited for a couple of hours .... and David would not settle at all.
Bev (the carer) said she would phone Barbara to see what time she was coming in. We had to leave as we were going out for dinner - a supposedly leisurely dinner with Janine - and we needed to get back to her place. Had a quick shower and changed to go to the Lower Plenty Hotel. Janine suggested we get there early so we could have a few drinks first and then dinner..... didn't quite turn out like that as she wanted to get back home for Zac!!
It was Zac's first day at home alone after being away from Janine for 2 mths ....... so our last night with our daughter in Melbourne ended up with a dog taking priority!!
into bed early so we could be up and leaving by around 6.30am the next morning. Won't go into all the drama's of the return flight as this posting is already a bit depressing (and negative!) suffice to say it took us NINETEEN HOURS "door to door" before we arrived back home in Singapore!!
Managed a few nice 'in-flight' photos though that I will 'post' soon....
we went to bed at midnight only to be woken at 5.00am to be told of the death of our friend Barbara. She apparently had died on Sunday evening while sitting at the dinner table........with us being at Bonbeach with David on Monday and Bev phoning - or trying to phone - by Tuesday it was realised that Barbara had not been seen for two days..... their friend (Ken) went to check on her as they have a spare key and found her already dead.
So, so sad.
Even more so to know that David had a premonition of her death, as he kept saying while we were with him "Barbara is dead, I know it, she is dead".
the funeral is to take place next Monday on December 8 at Mordialloc.
a good friend to all.